Everybody loses it at one point. Wether we are working too much, or too little. Wether we are with our partner too much, or just enough for a silent dinner. Whether we are exercising consistently, or on the couch watching a full season of whatever, in one sitting. We all lose balance from time to time. Here’s how we can get it back.
Have a morning routine – your ritual
It can be anything between 5 minutes and 2 hours, that will help you stay on track. This “time box” is where you’ll focus only on the most important things, that will give you the feeling that you have not wasted the day. We all know what it’s like when you go to bed and think “God, I was busy all day today and haven’t done what I really wanted to do”. Start with something that will contribute massively to your life and you won’t get that annoying feeling that the day was failure.
Set standards for most important areas of your life and monitor them
What are standards? Your uncompromising minimums that need to be done at the end of a certain time period. Small tip: adjust the length of that period to your possibilities AND have some buffer room. What works for me is reviewing the results at the end of each week. For instance, one evening out with friends for social life, 4 hours of working out and writing 2 motivational articles per week. Or the other way around, not spending more than a certain amount of hours on my bridge job. With reading business books or learning a language that approach might be harmful and a daily review may be needed. Adjust. Start a habit of monitoring what’s most important to you. That way no area of your life will be neglected.
Pay attention, follow your gut feeling and be flexible
Pay attention to your mental state, your body and your environment. There will be no use for your perfectly shaped body if you are emotionally drained, or what good is there in spending a specific number of evenings with your boyfriend if on that particular night something happened at his work and he needs you? Sometimes you’ll have to bend your rules ON PURPOSE and spend more time and energy on something you theoretically had taken care of.
Known and unknown – both are needed
Or, in other words as I put it, keep those challenges coming! We need some certainty in life. A rather stable source of income, confirmation of our professional skills, a warm body next to us that might be angry at times, but otherwise is there for you, etc. The list will be different as we are different. And that should be it for having some comfort. But don’t get lost in that! Stagnation and monotony can be equally lethal to your psyche! Solution? Make sure you’re always experimenting and, even if just a little, move outside of your comfort zone.
There is no such thing as perfection
And thus you’ll make mistakes. You’ll fail and have worse days or weeks and, especially if you’re ambitious, you’ll judge yourself harshly for it. As much as I’m a huge fan of “demand of yourself more than anybody else” concept, not forgiving yourself for slips is a straight way to not liking yourself, not to mention accepting.
There will always be some “bending” and compromising. Always! Just like there will always be struggle for the progress and we will always make mistakes. So don’t strive for elimination. Just try to give yourself a gift of paying attention to how satisfied you are with your own life.