These Tony Soprano quotes will show you who the real boss of the DiMeo crime family is.
Tony Soprano is a totally chaotic character, played by James Gandolfini, who is constantly jumping back and forth between good and evil in order to keep the family business operating smoothly.
In fact, Tony is so unpredictable, fans of the show, The Sopranos, never know whether they should love him or hate him.
As the street boss of the most dominant crime organization, it’s Tony’s job to make sure business runs as planned and peace is kept among peers. This means his choices are not always the most humane. However, despite being absolutely cruel at times, in his heart, Tony is a family man.
Don’t forget to also check out these adventurous Jumanji quotes from the original movie.
Fan favorite Tony Soprano quotes
1. “Even a broken clock is right twice a day.” – Tony Soprano
2. “A wrong decision is better than indecision.” – Tony Soprano
3. “We’re soldiers. Soldiers don’t go to hell.” – Tony Soprano
4. “Those who want respect, give respect.” – Tony Soprano
5. “I like people who don’t need everyone to like them.” — Tony Soprano
6. “You’re only religious when it suits you.” – Tony Soprano
7. Sometimes it’s important to give people the illusion of being in control.” — Tony Soprano
8. “Someday soon, you’re gonna have families of your own and if you’re lucky, you’ll remember the little moments like this, that we’re good.” — Tony Soprano
9. “All due respect, you got no idea what it’s like to be Number One. Every decision you make affects every facet of every other thing. It’s too much to deal with almost. And in the end, you’re completely alone with it all.” — Tony Soprano
10. “If you can quote the rules, then you can obey them.” — Tony Soprano
Funny Tony Soprano quotes and one-liners
11. “It’s good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that and I know. But lately, I’m getting the feeling that I came in at the end. The best is over.” – Tony Soprano
12. I don’t care how close you are, in the end, your friends are gonna let you down. Family: they’re the only ones you can depend on.” – Tony Soprano
13. “Oh, poor baby. What do you want, a Whitman Sampler?” – Tony Soprano
14. “You got any idea what my life would be worth if certain people found out I checked into a laughing academy?” – Tony Soprano
15. “I find I have to be the sad clown: laughing on the outside, crying on the inside.” – Tony Soprano
16. “Buy land, ’cause God ain’t making any more of it.” – Tony Soprano
17. “It’s war. Soldiers kill other soldiers. We’re in a situation where everyone involved knows the stakes and if you are going to accept those stakes, you’ve got to do certain things. It’s business.” — Tony Soprano
18. “This isn’t painful. Getting shot is painful. Getting stabbed in the ribs is painful. This … isn’t painful. It’s empty. Dead.” — Tony Soprano
19. “Blood. You’re going to lead this family into the 21st century.” — Tony Soprano
20. “Is this a woman thing? You ask me how I’m feeling. I tell you how I’m feeling, and now you’re going to torture me with it.” — Tony Soprano
21. “What kind of person can I be, where his own mother wants him dead?” — Tony Soprano
The best Tony Soprano quotes
22. “My father was in it. My uncle was in it. Maybe I was too lazy to think for myself.” — Tony Soprano
23. “All due respect, you got no f—–g idea what it’s like to be Number One. Every decision you make affects every facet of every other f—–g thing. It’s too much to deal with almost. And in the end you’re completely alone with it all.” — Tony Soprano
24. “It’s good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that and I know. But lately, I’m getting the feeling that I came in at the end. The best is over.” — Tony Soprano
25. “Cunnilingus and psychiatry brought us to this” — Tony Soprano
26. “I wipe my ass with your feelings.” — Tony Soprano
27. “I’m like King Midas in reverse. Everything I touch turns to s–t.” — Tony Soprano
28. “What use is an unloaded gun?” — Tony Soprano
29. “You got any idea what my life would be worth if certain people found out I checked into a laughing academy?” — Tony Soprano
30. “It’s good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that and I know. But lately, I’m getting the feeling that I came in at the end. The best is over.” — Tony Soprano
31. “Well, when you’re married, you’ll understand the importance of fresh produce.” — Tony Soprano
32. “You’re alright, baby.” — Tony Soprano
33. “They say everyday’s a gift, but why does it have to be a pair of socks?” — Tony Soprano
34. “I went ahead and ordered some for the table.” — Tony Soprano
More Tony Soprano quotes and dialogues
35. Tony Soprano: “I think it’s time for you to start to seriously consider salads.”
Bobby Baccilieri: “What do you mean?”
Tony Soprano: “What do I mean? I mean get off my car before you flip it over.”
36. Dr. Jennifer Melfi: “What line of work are you in?”
Tony Soprano: “Waste management consultant.”
37. Dr. Melfi: “Some people take pleasure in the simple doing of things.”
Tony Soprano: “The things I take pleasure in, I can’t do.”
38. “What happened to Gary Cooper, the strong silent type.” — Tony Soprano
39. “It’s almost time for turkey sandwiches!” — Tony Soprano
40. “Nostradamus and Notre Dame. It’s two different things completely.” — Tony Soprano
41. “A grown man made a wager. He lost. He made another one – he lost again. End of story.” — Tony Soprano
42. “What constitutes a fidget?” — Tony Soprano
43. “You bottomed out.” — Tony Soprano
44. “He’s gonna leave the house. On a piece of plywood if necessary, but he’s gonna leave the house.” — Tony Soprano
45. “We buried him…on a hill…overlooking a river…with pine cones all around.” — Tony Soprano
46. “Bad for the grass! Bad for the grass!” — Tony Soprano
47. “You should try tomato sauce for your a$$ – it’s the Italian version.” — Tony Soprano
48. “Why don’t you have a f-cking drink, will you? Because you’re driving everyone crazy with this sh-t!” — Tony Soprano
49. “I didn’t hurt nobody.” — Tony Soprano
50. “I haven’t been able to tell anybody this. I’m f-cking relieved” — Tony Soprano
Do you love or hate Tony?
Tony Soprano is an incredibly complex character, created by David Chase. He’s the protagonist of the show, The Sopranos, and so of course the fans want to root for him… At least in the beginning.
Tony is charming, funny, and charismatic. He’s an excellently written character, but a horrible person. So terrible, in fact, that many of the show’s fans end up hating him.
Despite being a mob boss who murders, tortures, and extorts people, Tony is also a family man who genuinely cares about the people he loves.
So, which side are you on? Do you love or hate Tony Soprano?
Which of these Tony Soprano quotes and lines was your favorite? Let us know in the comments below.
July 15, 2021 7:00 AM EST