Who doesn’t want to be successful? Almost all of us want to succeed in life. However, a vast majority of us will just go through our entire life without even experiencing the sweet taste of success! Have you ever wondered why? Well I did! I spent quite a lot of time researching the habits and psychology of successful people just to find out what the difference between them and the rest of the population is. What I found out was not only an eye opener of my own behavior, but also gave me the explanation about why many people are not hungry for success.
We have several unconscious beliefs around success. Although in our dreams we might like to be successful and enjoy the life of freedom and choices and luxury, the reality is different. The very thought of being successful or even being surrounded by successful people, can bring up a lot of fear and insecurity in many people. This very uncomfortable feeling is what makes us runaway into our closet of life and miss out on the variety of great experiences that life has to offer.That is why we are not hungry for success.
In my lifestyle coaching work with women, I realized that there are 3 big reasons that keeps us away from the hunger of success:
When we become successful we tend to receive a lot of attention. Even though deep inside of us, we may love being the center of attention, for many of us, it may bring up our personal challenges. Being visible among others will mean that we have to always maintain ourselves to the standards and expectations of people watching us.
Blending in the crowd is easy. This is what most of us are used to in our daily life. However, being on the spotlight is not. For example – look at some of the young celebrities. Their visibility sometimes leads to ruining their career. They fall under the constant pressure of being watched all the time.
The good thing about being successful and visible is that people look up to you. That means you then have the ability to positively influence people and inspire them by being a living example.
2. Peer Pressure
We worry that if we become successful our friends and family will not recognize us or like us the way we were before. We worry that we will lose our place among them. Sometimes we may even think that people from our past know us in a certain way and will not accept the new us. Many of the women that I worked with had unconscious belief that if they become successful their loved ones may feel too small and inadequate among them.
The desire to feel accepted and to fit in the society is one of the strongest forces within us humans. We may not be taken as that ‘cool’ person anymore who used to like to fool around. Instead our social circle may think that we have become too serious about our life.
The good thing about being successful is that it opens you to a whole new world of successful people who are living an aware, smart, free and abundant lifestyle and are able to contribute to the society in a much bigger way. I am sure each one of us want to contribute to a better society.
3. Constant Change
Being successful also involves fears such as the fear of public speaking. When we become successful, we will have to make a lot of lifestyle changes, make quick decisions, and learn new things. We fear that we will have to be on a constant alert to face challenges at any given time, and that we may lose control of the situation. We over analyze every situation in order to avoid failing.
Life is a constant motion and the only thing constant in life is change. All humans are creative creatures and capable of being adaptive to changes. Once we accept this belief, facing changes becomes easier and much more rewarding.
I invite you to pause here for a moment and become honest with yourself. Are any of these 3 big reason stopping you to follow the success trail that you dream of? They certainly did for me and the many people I have met and read about. The good thing is that at least you become aware of the fact that these unconscious beliefs may be hindering your success.
So what can you do to get your hunger of success back?
Get clarity on your life ‘s purpose. This is the one motivating factor for successful people.
The Japanese called this inquiry of getting clarity on your life’s purpose as ‘Ikigai’.
‘Ikigai’ means ‘reason for being’. According to Japanese tradition, ‘Ikigai’ is the reason for you to wake up in the morning. It is the reason you look forward to every new day in your life.
Here are 4 questions that can help you get closer to you ‘Ikigai’ i.e. your life’s purpose so that you are no longer running away from success. These 4 questions can assist you in opening up to infinite possibilities that life has to offer to you to grow as an individual, feel fulfilled in your life and make a difference to the society.
- What do you love to do?
- Does the world need anything?
- Are you good at anything?
- What can you get paid for?
Once you are able to clarify these questions for yourself and begin to take small action steps every single day, you will begin to get closer to your life’s purpose.
And yes, the hunger to succeed to fulfill your life’s purpose in this world will never leave you! This is how I discovered my sacred purpose of assisting busy women to explore their femininity in order to experience more energy, fulfillment and pleasure, while avoiding burn out.
Success is for everyone including you, if you activate your hunger for it. Are you ready?