How to Kick Fear and Doubt to the Curb, Once and for All
April 13, 2017 12:00 AM EST | 9 min read
Every time I find myself resisting, locking down a higher level goal, or avoiding repeatedly, claiming it in my journaling, I remind myself:
“Being switched on, in the flow, on FIRE and result -based where you truly DO get to have it all, is nothing more than a tiny –little –choice.”
Think about it:
EVERYTHING you actually decided to make happen in your life, happened.
If it didn’t, you simply didn’t decide and/or there was a bigger reason for you NOT to let it happen.
Something (which consciously or subconsciously) caused you enough fear or uncertainty to not allow the GOOD thing to take place.
Side note: I’d look at that, if I were you.
Dig INTO that stuff and figure it out, a.k.a. DECIDE to get over it!
The insanely exciting thing here is, if you’ve not actually stopped and thought about it, YOU CAN CHOOSE YOUR OWN REALITY.
I know we SAY that all the time.
We say ‘hell yes’ to that stuff in our sleep!
But seriously now: have you actually, truly locked in ALL THE WAY to the picture of what you want?
I know for me at least that, that is something I need to do repeatedly!
DAILY – and in fact most days, more than once.
Journaling, mindset work, writing my reality – that’s not just something I post artsy pictures on Instagram of because I use Mont Blanc pens and pretty writing books.
That is how I create MY life, baby.
It’s the most important part of my everyday action.
It’s how I continue to lock into what I’m creating.
Until I see/feel/live/breathe it, I’m just going KEEP on writing it.
To be perfectly honest, even once I AM it, I’ll keep on writing it, and just let it continue to evolve.
So don’t imagine for a second that goal setting or writing out what you want to allow in, is a ONE TIME or SOMETIME thing.
If you want to bring it to life in a physical sense, you need to feel it in your SOUL.
It needs to consume your mind in the sense that it’s completely implanted there.
This is all journaling is: thought and belief conditioning.
Even every personal development junkie knows:
- Your beliefs form your thoughts.
- Your thoughts become your words.
- Your words become your actions.
- Your actions form your habits.
- Your habits become your values.
- Your values dictate your DESTINY.
That’s personal development 101 – but are YOU living by it?
Or are you allowing fear and doubt to rule your life?
Don’t Let Fear and Doubt Rule Your Life
I can tell you that whenever I hang around my successful friends (sorry, my friends!), whenever I go to dinner or drinks with clients, whenever I am in a success environment and just listen in on conversations around me, I hear the outcome of people who decided what to believe.
The physical manifestation of that is, there are these people who are rich, healthy, energized, switched on, in the flow, focused – and on top of the world.
That is NOT an accident.
Yet I think we still allow ourselves to be distracted from our big dreams by fear and doubt; the anxiety about how, or fear that deep down we can’t.
Or worst of all, the question of whether we’re good enough in the first place.
It is critical to NOT allow yourself to continue to engage in this way of thinking.
It is deadly to imagine even for a moment that your thoughts are of little consequence.
What you think will form your entire future.
It spews out of you, and you can’t control that.
Everybody who knows you can see WHO you are.
If YOU stop and think about it, you’ll see the future you’re creating, and I hope that it stops you in your tracks and wakes you up enough to want to form a new, bigger, bolder one – a more empowered one, now, by just choosing to BELIEVE THAT YOU CAN.
Decide That You Will
Then follow-through as though you knew it’s a done deal.
I can tell you that I’m the same as anybody else in that fear and doubt can get to me.
I battle resistance at every level.
You should have seen me freaking out at the start of my photo shoot the other day, feeling like I look too much, too Hollywood, and I can’t do this…even though it’s exactly what I came for! My mind wanted to RUN AND HIDE.
Go back to what felt normal, comfortable, allowed!
But I rolled up my sleeves.
I worked my thang.
Here is where I do know I’m different from those who talk about growth, and big-time success, yet don’t manage to create it.
Here is where I see my friends and clients act differently, also:
Even when I feel fear, uncertainty, or overwhelm, or I want to hide, I fully know and believe that if I just choose to decide anyway, I can and will create it.
So I can take even the most insanely HUGE goal (that freaks me out), that I feel like it’s such a big freaking stretch, and I just have no idea how to make happen, and then I remind myself:
“Kat – EVERYTHING you ever actually decided you’d make happen, has.
So just find a way to actually decide, and put aside whether it’s possible or not, because you know that no matter how full on crazy or uber-awesome it might be – if you decide, it will happen.
It always has.
And always will.”
(Yes. I do actually talk to myself like that – often! That is LIFE creation right there!)
So the only hard thing, really, I’ve found, is actually NOT doing whatever you ultimately find yourself doing to get results.
The actual physical work or hustle is just work or hustle.
You gotta get through the day somehow anyway, and either way, you are going to work at something!
You might as well stop working at things you don’t love, and weren’t born for, which on the surface appears less scary and therefore easier, but which actually drains your soul, and instead?
Just work at the things that are going get you to where you CHOOSE to be.
Go Ahead – Take That Leap
The actual hard thing is NOT the work required to be famous, sexy, hot, or rich.
The hard thing is summoning up the courage to take the leap.
Jump off the ledge.
Say YES to the things you want.
Commit that you are going to do it.
And then take the first step.
If only there were a way you could learn how to just get OVER your fear and doubt enough to take that first step!
Your whole life would become an automated creation of whatever you choose!
Do you see how ridiculous it is, that you – we – allow ourselves to simply NOT choose?
Think about it … ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS MAKE A NEW CHOICE.
Everyday, there are people who are boldly living their dreams (maybe inspiring you because you have the same ones), and are simply stepping off that ledge.
They’re just as scared as you.
But yet we do it anyway.
I do want to stress that it is an everyday choice, but here’s the thing: Success is a habit.
I look resistance and fear and doubt in the eye everyday the same as anyone.
I just long ago programmed myself to take the leap anyway.
I just long ago chose, NOT to let my bullshit be bigger than my dreams.
I long ago decided that I would be the kind of person who takes action and sets goals based on the results that I want – what I really want – rather than whether or not I feel like it.
Here’s the thing, gorgeous:
Your life will be dictated by one of two realities:
- You either create the life you feel like creating, based on human resistance, fear and doubt; OR
- You create the one you were born to create – and always had the choice to take.
Here’s what it comes down to: You have ONE life to live.
This is NOT a dress rehearsal. That one life?
It’s this one right here.
And inasmuch as it is incredibly uncomfortable, even terrifying, to say yes to what is calling you most in business or in life, if you want to create a life on your terms, then you have no other choice.
I think that when it comes to choosing to be courageous, it helps to know that it IS a choice.
You don’t have to feel courageous to act it!
In fact, success is all about taking faith-based action.
You CAN’T see what’s ahead of you – and there’s no way to – yet you know that if you don’t move forward, then you’ll find yourself being eaten alive, from the inside out.
What I find incredibly helpful in my journey, every time I’m looking to go to the next level, is to get out of my emotion and simply ask myself:
“What would I be doing right now, if I were already that person?”
Then, as scary or as daunting or even nonsensical as it might seem – I do it.
Then one day, who knows?
You wake up and look around, and you’ve created the life you used to only dream of.
Life is NOW. So press PLAY.