35 Erma Bombeck Quotes About Life, Marriage and God

If you’re in search of something to lift you up while making you smile, these Erma Bombeck quotes are perfect for you.

Erma Bombeck, an American humorist and writer, captured the hearts of millions with her witty observations on everyday life.

Born in 1927 in Dayton, Ohio, Bombeck’s columns and books, often laced with humor and poignancy, spoke to the trials and tribulations of the average suburban family, making her a household name from the 1960s through the 1990s.

Her ability to find laughter in the mundane, to elevate the ordinary into something extraordinary, and to speak truths wrapped in humor, made her work universally relatable.

Why should we dive into Erma Bombeck quotes?

Because Bombeck had a unique talent for turning the roller coaster of life into laugh-out-loud moments that resonate with anyone who’s ever dealt with children, partners, or the chaos of daily life.

Her quotes are more than just funny one-liners; they’re slices of wisdom, offering insights into the human condition with a generous dose of laughter.

Reading her quotes, we’re reminded not to take life too seriously, to cherish the small moments, and to always find humor in our struggles.

Bombeck’s legacy teaches us the power of laughter as a way to navigate life’s challenges, making her quotes a must-read for anyone looking to lighten their load with a good chuckle.

The late humorist was known as “the woman who made the world laugh” and it’s easy to see why after reading these Erma Bombeck quotes we have for you.

Inspirational Erma Bombeck Quotes

1. “I am not a glutton – I am an explorer of food.” – Erma Bombeck

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2. “Housework can kill you if done right.” – Erma Bombeck

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3. “He who laughs … Lasts.” – Erma Bombeck

4. “Never have more children than you have car windows.” – Erma Bombeck

5. “Dreams have only one owner at a time. That’s why dreamers are lonely.” – Erma Bombeck

6. “I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.” – Erma Bombeck

7. “Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.” – Erma Bombeck

8. “Never accept a drink from a urologist.” – Erma Bombeck

9. “Humorists can never start to take themselves seriously. It’s literary suicide.” – Erma Bombeck

10. “It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.” – Erma Bombeck

Erma Bombeck quotes about life

11. “When your mother asks, ‘Do you want a piece of advice?’ it is a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. You’re going to get it anyway.” – Erma Bombeck

12. “My theory on housework is, if the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?” – Erma Bombeck

13. “When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me’.” – Erma Bombeck

14. “Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?” – Erma Bombeck

15. “Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.” – Erma Bombeck

16. “There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.” – Erma Bombeck

17. “There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.” – Erma Bombeck

18. “Don’t worry about who doesn’t like you, who has more, or who’s doing what.” – Erma Bombeck

Erma Bombeck quotes about love

19. “Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere.” – Erma Bombeck

20. “The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.” – Erma Bombeck

21. “When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he’s doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911.” – Erma Bombeck

22. “Men who have a thirty-six-televised-football-games-a-week-habit should be declared legally dead and their estates probated.” – Erma Bombeck

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Erma Bombeck quotes about fear

23. “All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.” – Erma Bombeck

24. “You hear a lot of dialogue on the death of the American family. Families aren’t dying. They’re merging into big conglomerates.” – Erma Bombeck

25. “Raising a family wasn’t something I put on my resumé, but I have to ask myself, would I apply for the same job again?” – Erma Bombeck

Erma Bombeck Quotes To Give Your Courage

26. “Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.” — Erma Bombeck

27. “My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.” — Erma Bombeck

28. “Cleaning the house while the children are home is like shoveling while it’s still snowing.” — Erma Bombeck

29. “It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.” — Erma Bombeck

30. “Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.” — Erma Bombeck

31. “Success is outliving your failures.” — Erma Bombeck

32. “It seemed rather incongruous that in a society of super sophisticated communication, we often suffer from a shortage of listeners.” — Erma Bombeck

33. “When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies.” — Erma Bombeck

34. “Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.” — Erma Bombeck

35. “Laughter rises out of tragedy when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.” — Erma Bombeck

Which  Erma Bombeck quotes were your favorite?