20 Funny Good Omens Quotes About The End Times

By Stephanie Kirby | Published December 25, 2022

Check out these Good Omens quotes for a lighter look at the End Times.

Good Omens is a 1990 book that was collaborated on between two English authors, Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman.

The book’s plot takes a lighter side on the view of the End Times by making it into a comedy.

The plot follows the birth of the son of Satan and how a comfortable angel and demon work to stop the End Times so that they can continue their comfortable lives in England.

Aziraphale is the angel, and Crowley is the demon, and both have been around since the beginning of Earth and, over time, have formed an odd type of friendship.

Over the years, these two have also taken a liking to humans and want them to continue.

When Crowly finds out that the son of Satan has been swapped for a different baby, he knows he has to stop this beginning of the End Times.

Aziraphale and Crowley decide to pose as the gardener and nanny to influence the son of Satan as he grows and keep him from being able to separate good from evil.

Follow along with the Good Omens quotes to learn more about the story.

The best Good Omens quotes

Check out some of the best quotes from the book.

1. “Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of our lives.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

2. “Potentially evil. Potentially good, too, I suppose.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

3. “You see, evil always contains the seeds of its own destruction.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

4. “With a P. I don’t know about the other stuff, but we come from Surrey.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

5. “The really important thing to be was yourself, just as hard as you could.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

6. “Don’t think of it as dying; just think of it as leaving early to avoid the rush.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

7. “Evil, in general, does not sleep, and therefore doesn’t see why anyone else should.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

8. “Shadwell hated all southerners and, by inference, was standing at the North Pole.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

9. “You don’t have to test everything to destruction just to see if you made it right.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

10. “All tapes left in a car for more than about a fortnight metamorphose into Best of Queen albums.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

Thought-provoking Good Omens quotes

Check out the quotes below that will make you think.

11. “An Angel who did not so much Fall as Saunter Vaguely Downwards.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

12. “There was no light at the end of the tunnel–or if there was, it was an oncoming train.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

13. “Hell may have all the best composers, but heaven has all the best choreographers.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

14. “The Enemy, of course. But an enemy for six thousand years now, which made him a sort of friend.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

15. “And there never was an apple, in Adam’s opinion, that wasn’t worth the trouble you got into for eating it.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

16. “Where you found the real McCoy, the real grace and the real heart-stopping evil, was right inside the human mind.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

17. “If you want to imagine the future, imagine a boy and his dog and his friends. And a summer that never ends.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

18. “Anyway, if you stopped tellin’ people it’s all sorted out after they’re dead, they might try sorting it all out while they’re alive.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

19. “Loyalty was a great thing, but no lieutenants should be forced to choose between their leader and a circus with elephants.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

20. “She was beautiful, but she was beautiful in the way a forest fire was beautiful: something to be admired from a distance, not up close.” ― Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett