Witty Quotes to Sharpen Your Cleverness

These witty quotes will give you a motivational push as well as a bit of humor. 

Having wit means you are intelligent but in a funny way! Developing witty characteristics certainly has its benefits. People tend to like witty people more. Having wit makes you seem both smart and relatable. Witty people put others at ease, therefore people tend to gravitate towards witty people and look at those with wit as leaders in their environment. 

There are many traits that a leader should have. While inspirational, motivational, and charismatic are all traits that come to mind first, another important characteristic is the ability to be funny. Leaders often need to lead others in stressful or unfavorable situations, and, sometimes they have to deliver bad news.

A leader who is unable to see the humor in life may come off harsh and may demotivate their team, whereas a leader who is witty may feel more trustworthy and therefore more capable to their team members.

See if these witty quotes strike your funny bone.

Also check out our list of John Mulaney quotes that will remind you laughter is the best medicine.

Wise and witty quotes

1. “Arguing with a fool proves there are two.” – Doris M. Smith

2. “A person with a sharp tongue will eventually cut themselves.” – J. Robson Koenig

3. “A witty saying proves nothing.” – Voltaire

4. “By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.” – Robert Frost

5. “Do your own thinking independently. Be the chess player, not the chess piece.” – Ralph Charell

6. “If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.” – Mark Twain

7. “Dreams have only one owner at a time. That’s why dreamers are lonely.” – Erma Bombeck

8. “Pretending to care what men think is an art. It takes moments to learn, but lifetimes to master. I’d like to believe I’m an expert.” – Dennis Sharpe

9. “The first principle is that you must not fool yourself, and you are the easiest person to fool.” – Richard P. Feynman

10. “The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” – Wayne Dyer

11. “The important thing to remember is not to forget.” – Benny Bellamacina

12. “We tend to get what we expect.” – Norman Vincent Peale

13. “The world hates change yet it is the only thing that has brought progress.” – Charles F. Kettering

14. “Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change.” – Confucius

Funny witty quotes

15. “Don’t worry about people stealing an idea. If it’s original, you will have to ram it down their throats.” – Howard Aiken

16. “One man’s theology is another man’s belly laugh.” – Robert Heinlein

17. “One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.” – Rita Mae Brown

18. “The advantage of growing up with siblings is that you become very good at fractions.” – Robert Brault

19. “The problem with a life spent reading is you know too much.” – Josh Lanyon

20. “When I die cremate me so I can finally fit into something small.” – Xondra Day

21. “Never miss a good chance to shut up.” – Will Rogers

22. “Light travels faster than sound. That’s why some people seem bright until they talk!” – Unknown

Witty quotes that are inspirational 

23. “A person is wise if he listens to millions of advice and doesn’t implement any of it.” – Michael Bassey Johnson

24. “Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.” – Confucius

25. “Dreams don’t work unless you do.” – John C. Maxwell

26. “To improve is to change. To be perfect is to change often.” – Winston Churchill

27. “The measure of success is not whether you have a tough problem to deal with, but whether it’s the same problem you had last year.” – John Foster Dulles

28. “Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” – Confucius

Also read these inspiring laughter quotes proving why it’s the best medicine.

Witty quotes about friendships and relationships

29. “A skunk is better company than a person who prides himself on being ‘frank’.” – Robert Heinlein

30. “A true friend is someone who is there for you when he’d rather be anywhere else.” – Len Wein

31. “A true friend overlooks your failures and tolerates your success!” – Doug Larson

32. “Courtship is to marriage, as a very witty prologue to a very dull play.” – William Congreve

33. “So just let me deal with it, I can be emotionally flawed and still love you all at the same time. I’m a great multitasker.” – Holly Hood

34. “The best way to destroy an enemy is to make him a friend.” – Abraham Lincoln

35. “The only way to have a friend is to be one.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

36. “Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don’t say.” – Unknown

37. “Friends are those rare people who ask how you are and then wait to hear the answer.” – Unknown

38. “Friends are like melons; shall I tell you why? To find a good one, you must one hundred try.” – Claude Mermet

39. “I don’t miss him; I miss who I thought he was.” – Unknown

40. “It’s far better to be alone than in bad company.” – George Washington

Motivational witty quotes

41. “An ounce of action is worth a ton of theory.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

42. “Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” – William James

43. “Action will destroy your procrastination.” – Og Mandino

44. “Don’t be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

45. “Playing it safe is the riskiest choice we can ever make.” – Sarah Ban Breathnach

46. “The problem human beings face is not that we aim too high and fail, but that we aim too low and succeed.” – Michaelangelo (See more Michaelangelo quotes)

47. “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.” – Henry Ford

48. “It is astonishing how long it takes to finish something you are not working on.” – Unknown

49. “Many people have a good aim in life, but for some reason they never pull the trigger.” – Unknown

50. “You can’t build a reputation on what you’re going to do.” – Henry Ford

Other witty quotes and sayings

51. “A technicality I’m prepared to hide wildly behind.” – Jim Butcher

52. “I respect only those who resist me, but cannot tolerate them.” – Charles de Gaulle

53. “It is safer to beg than to take, but it is finer to take than to beg.” – Oscar Wilde

54. “Experience was something it was difficult to avoid, though many people had managed to keep it to a minimum.” – Philip José Farmer

55. “My mistakes are usually so enjoyable that I tend to repeat them.” – Lisa Kleypas

Which witty quote was your favorite?

There are many benefits to fine-tuning your witty talent. Beyond making you more likable and trustworthy, wittiness strengthens your intelligence and helps you to be more creative. Being put on the spot to come up with witty banter will make your brian work harder, and therefore make you more capable during stressful moments. 

Hopefully, these witty quotes help spark the wit in you. Come back to these quotes whenever you’re looking for a motivational push as well as a bit of humor. 

Did you enjoy these witty quotes and sayings? Do you have a witty quote you would like to share? Let us know in the comment section below.