Lovable, awkward, and always hilarious Chandler Bing is an iconic character from the Friends television series.
We hope you love these Chandler Bing quotes as much as we do.
Many sitcoms have tried, but no show has matched the popularity of the classic ‘90s show, Friends, since it ended almost 20 years ago.
The show’s popularity isn’t entirely due to a devoted original fan base, but constant reruns and streaming has introduced the show to new generations who are charmed by i’s relatable characters.
Perhaps the most relatable friend is Chandler Bing.
Chandler grew up in a broken home and learned to use humor to hide his emotions.
Despite constantly roasting his friends, at his core, Chandler is honest, kind, and loving.
Throughout the show’s 10 seasons we watch Chandler grow from an awkward twenty-something learning how to traverse adulthood to becoming a loving and supportive husband and father.
Enjoy these Chandler Bing quotes!
Don’t forget to also check out these Tony Soprano quotes from the boss.
If you like this article, we suggest you explore our most popular quotes article, a list of short inspirational quotes for daily encouragement.
Read more related content on our inspirational quotes category page.
Best Chandler Bing quotes and one-liners
1. “Oh, man. In my next life, I’m coming back as a toilet brush!” — Chandler Bing
2. “Because, Phoebe, sometimes after you sleep with someone you have to kill a fish.” — Chandler Bing
3. “The Sheer Volume (Of Questions). It Was Like Flying With The Riddler!” — Chandler Bing
4. “I think I can safely say that we all have family issues, work, and/or are sick.” — Chandler Bing
5. “Cheese. It’s milk that you chew.” — Chandler Bing
6. “You have to stop the q-tip when there’s resistance!” — Chandler Bing
7. “So it seems like this internet thing is here to stay.” — Chandler Bing
8. “If I were a guy and…did I just say ‘if I were a guy?’” — Chandler Bing
9. “If I’m gonna be an old, lonely man, I’m gonna need a thing. You know, a hook, like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So, I figure I’ll be Crazy Man with a Snake, y’know? Crazy Snake Man. And I’ll get more snakes, call them my babies, kids will walk past my place, they will run. ‘Run away from Crazy Snake Man,’ they’ll shout.” — Chandler Bing
10. “What must it be like not to be crippled by fear and self-loathing?” — Chandler Bing
Most quotable Chandler Bing quotes
11. “I say more dumb things before 9 A.M. than most people say all day.” — Chandler Bing
12. “When I first meet somebody it’s usually panic, anxiety, and a great deal of sweating.” — Chandler Bing
13. “It’s always better to lie than to have the complicated discussion.” — Chandler Bing
14. “We swallow our feelings, even if it means we’re unhappy forever. Sound good?” — Chandler Bing
15. “Like what she saw, huh? Dug my action, did she? Checking out the Chan Chan Man!” — Chandler Bing
16. “I’m hopeless and awkward and desperate for love!” — Chandler Bing
17. “Should I use my invisibility to fight crime, or for evil?” — Chandler Bing
18. “Oh, that makes me feel so warm in my hollow, tin chest.” — Chandler Bing
19. “I am not “blah”! I’m a hoot.” — Chandler Bing
20. “I tend to keep talking until somebody stops me.” — Chandler Bing
21. “Hi. I’m Chandler Bing. I make jokes when I’m uncomfortable.” — Chandler Bing
22. “I’m full, and yet I know if I stop eating this, I’ll regret it.” — Chandler Bing
23. “When I was younger, I started using humor as a defense mechanism.” — Chandler Bing
Sarcastic Chandler Bing quotes and dialogues
24. “I’m not so good with the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?” — Chandler Bing
25. “Oh, I know. This must be so hard. ‘Oh, no! Two women love me. They’re both gorgeous and sexy. My wallet’s too small for my fifties and my diamond shoes are too tight!’” — Chandler Bing
Could Chandler Bing BE the best Friends character?
Though Chandler never misses a chance to tease his friends (and, let’s be honest, they are constantly giving him new ammo), behind his sarcastic comments is a heart full of love.
In the early seasons of Friends, we see Chandler use his humor to mask his insecurities and awkwardness, which simply made him more relatable to the audience.
Who doesn’t feel insecure and awkward in their early twenties?
And though he never grew out of the awkwardness, we see him slowly gain confidence throughout the seasons as he grows up, falls in love, and finally accepts himself for who he is.
While all the friends are relatable in some way, Mrs. Chanandler Bong will always have a special place in our nostalgic hearts.
Did you enjoy these Chandler Bing quotes and lines?
Which quote was your favorite?
Let us know in the comments below.