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Awkward Napoleon Dynamite Quotes Sure to Make You Laugh

From a cult-classic, these hilarious Napoleon Dynamite quotes are sure to make you laugh and elevate your mood.

Napoleon Dynamite is a comedy film produced in 2004.

It details the escapades of the title character Napoleon and leaves the viewer asking if Napoleon Dynamite is high! 

He is an exceptionally awkward teenage boy who has trouble fitting in.

He lives with his Grandma, who is injured in an accident.

This leads to Uncle Rico coming to watch over Napoleon and Kip.

A few fun facts I learned about this film: the lead actor, Jon Heder, was only paid $1000 for the role, the song Napoleon dances to is called “Canned Heat”, and Kip is 32 years old!

Below is our collection of hilarious Napoleon Dynamite quotes that are sure to make your day.

Enjoy reading them, and be sure to also check out our list of the best Ron Burgundy quotes as well as these funny Minion quotes.

Napoleon Dynamite quotes about food

1. “Tina, You Fat Lard, Come Get Some Dinner. Tina! Eat The FOOD!” –Napoleon Dynamite

2. “Too bad, she said she doesn’t want you here when she gets back because you’ve been ruining everybody’s lives and eating all our steak.” – Napoleon Dynamite

3. “Tina, come get some ham.” – Napoleon Dynamite

4. “What can I have for dinner? Kip ate the last frozen dinner!” – Napoleon Dynamite

5. “I caught you a delicious bass.” – Napoleon Dynamite

6. “Stay home and eat all the freakin’ chips, Kip!” – Napoleon Dynamite

7. “I See You’re Drinking 1%. Is That ‘Cause You Think You’re Fat? ‘Cause You’re Not. You Could Totally Be Drinking Whole If You Wanted To.” – Napoleon Dynamite

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8. “No, I’m freakin’ starving! I didn’t get to eat *anything* today.” – Napoleon Dynamite

Napoleon Dynamite quotes about money and shopping

9. “You pay the bills for that? Does that cost money every time you’re on, like for minutes on the phone?” – Uncle Rico

10. “Why would I want to buy any of this girly crap?” – Napoleon Dynamite

11. “Napoleon, you know we can’t afford the fun pack. What, do you think money grows on trees in this family? Take it back! And get some Pampers for you and your brother while you’re at it.” – Uncle Rico

12. “I’m gonna tell you somethin’ right now. While you’re out there playing patty cake with your friend Pedro, your Uncle Rico is makin’ 120 bucks.” – Uncle Rico

13. [outside, scratching ticket] “Yes! Three spuds! You picked a good one! That’s ten dollars! Yes!” – Napoleon Dynamite

14. “I could make that much money in five seconds!” – Napoleon Dynamite

15. “Napoleon, it looks like you don’t have a job. So why don’t you get out there and feed Tina?” – Uncle Rico

Also check out these hilarious Monty Python and the Holy Grail quotes that will make your day.

Napoleon Dynamite quotes about girls

16. “I Don’t Even Have Any Good Skills. You Know, Like Nunchuck Skills, Bow Hunting Skills, Computer Hacking Skills. Girls Only Want Boyfriends Who Have Great Skills!” – Napoleon Dynamite

17. “Well, you have a sweet bike. And you’re really good at hooking up with chicks. Plus you’re like the only guy at school who has a mustache.” – Napoleon Dynamite

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18. “Napoleon, Don’t Be Jealous That I’ve Been Chatting Online With Babes All Day. Besides, We Both Know That I’m Training To Be A Cage Fighter.” – Kip

19. “Well, things are getting pretty serious right now. I mean, we chat online for, like, two hours every day so I guess you could say things are gettin’ pretty serious.” – Kip

20. “LaFawnduh is *the* best thing that has ever happened to me. I’m 100% positive she’s my soul mate. Don’t worry Napoleon, I’m sure there’s a babe out there for you too. Peace out.” – Kip

21. “My old girlfriend from Oklahoma was gonna fly out for the dance but she couldn’t cause she’s doing some modeling right now.” – Napoleon Dynamite

22. “Yeah, I took her to the mall to get some glamor shots for her birthday one year.” – Napoleon Dynamite

Random Napoleon Dynamite quotes

23. “It’s Pretty Much My Favorite Animal. It’s Like A Lion And A Tiger Mixed… Bred For Its Skills In Magic.” – Napoleon Dynamite

24. “Yeah, Right. Who’s The One That Knows Illegal Ninja Moves From The Government?” – Napoleon Dynamite

25. “So, we’re pretty much friends by now, right?” – Napoleon Dynamite

Don’t forget to also read these inspirational Doctor Who quotes.

Which of these Napoleon Dynamite quotes is your favorite?

Some may wonder if Napoleon Dynamite has a plot or if it is just a crazy cult classic.

I think it does, and there are even lessons to be learned.

The movie is about fitting in, finding friendship in unexpected places, and family!

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If you haven’t watched this movie yet, you should give it a shot! If nothing else, you will love the llama!!

Did you enjoy these Napoleon Dynamite quotes and lines?

Do you have any interesting facts to add?

What is your favorite part of the movie?

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Danielle Dahl, Lead Contributor
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