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Ron Burgundy Quotes to Make You Laugh

For those times when you need something so silly that you can’t help but laugh, we give you these Ron Burgundy quotes. 

Anchorman is a movie about a 1970s news anchorman in San Diego named Ron Burgundy played by none other than Will Ferrell.

He struggles when the station hires a female anchor.

As he and the other “anchormen” continue in their male chauvinism, she moves into his territory. 

If you couldn’t guess from the casting of actors like Will Ferrell, Paul Rudd, and Steve Carrell, the film is a comedy.

And, it’s one with lines that are so silly and stupid that sometimes you just can’t help but laugh. 

Below is our collection of hilarious Ron Burgundy quotes that will have you cracking up right now.


If you’re a fan of Will Ferrell, be sure to also check out our list of funny Talladega Nights quotes.

Funny Ron Burgundy quotes

1. “I love scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly.” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes about scotch

2. “OK before we start, let’s go over the ground-rules … No touching of the hair or face … And THAT’S IT. Now FIGHT!” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes about fighting

3. “I don’t know how to put this but I’m kind of a big deal. People know me. I’m very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes on being a big deal

4. “Well if you were a man, I’d punch you. Punch you right in the mouth.” – Ron Burgundy  

funny Ron Burgundy quotes

5. “I’m gonna punch you in the ovary, that’s what I’m gonna do. A straight shot. Right to the baby maker.” – Ron Burgundy

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Ron Burgundy quotes about punching people

6. “I’m in a glass case of emotion!” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes about emotions

7. “Mmm. I look good. I mean, really good. Hey, everyone! Come and see how good I look!” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes about his good looks

8. “Don’t act like you’re not impressed.” – Ron Burgundy

short Ron Burgundy quotes

9. “It’s terrible. She has beautiful eyes, and her hair smells like cinnamon!” – Ron Burgundy  

terrible Ron Burgundy quotes

10. “Hello? Who’s there, I’m talkin? Hello? Who is this? Baxter… is that you? Baxter! Bark twice if you’re in Milwaukee… Is this Wilt Chamberlain? Have the courage to say something! Hello?” – Ron Burgundy

long Ron Burgundy quotes

You might also like these neurotic George Costanza quotes about nothing.

More hilarious Ron Burgundy quotes

11. “It’s so damn hot. Milk was a bad choice.” – Ron Burgundy  

Ron Burgundy quotes about milk

12. “You know how to cut to the core of me Baxter. You’re so wise. You’re like a miniature Buddha, covered with hair.” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes about baxter

13. “What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole wheel of cheese? How’d you do that? Heck, I’m not even mad; that’s amazing.” – Ron Burgundy  

amazing Ron Burgundy quotes

14. “I’m kind of a big deal. People know me.” – Ron Burgundy

short funny Ron Burgundy quotes

15. “Oh Audrey – I look like hell! I got bags under my eyes. What’s that? Well if you were a man, I’d punch you. Punch you right in the mouth. That’s bush. Bush league. YOU HEAR ME? AUDREY! LOOK AT ME! I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Alright?” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes about audrey

16. “I saw that. Brick killed a guy. Did you throw a trident?” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes about brick

17. “Well, I could be wrong, but I believe diversity is an old, old wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era.” – Ron Burgundy

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Ron Burgundy quotes about diversity

18. “You stay classy, San Diego. I’m Ron Burgundy?” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes about sand diego

19. “If you want to throw down in fisticuffs, fine, I’ve got Jack Johnson and Tom O’Leary waitin’ for ya…right here!” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes that will make you laugh

20. “I’m not a baby! I’m a man! An ANCHORMAN!” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes on being an anchorman

Also read these funny Minion quotes that will make your day.

Ron Burgundy quotes: one-liners

21. “Sweet Lincoln’s mullet!” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes about lincoln

22. “Son of a bee-sting!” – Ron Burgundy

short hilarious Ron Burgundy quotes

23. “Knights of Columbus, that hurt!” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes about knights of columbus

24. “By the beard of Zeus!” – Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy quotes about zeus

Other Ron Burgundy quotes and Anchorman quotes

25. “It is anchorman, not anchorlady. And that is a scientific fact.” – Ron Burgundy  

anchorman Ron Burgundy quotes

Don’t forget to also check out these Pennywise quotes from the scariest clown of all.

Are you cracking up yet? 

If you’ve never watched the movie before, then most of these Ron Burgundy quotes probably have you scratching your head.

They just aren’t going to make sense out of the context of the movie.

But, if you’ve watched and loved the movie, then I’m guessing that you’re cracking up right now. 

Sometimes when you’ve had a rough day, you just need something you can watch to escape from the world and give your brain a chance to rest.

If that’s the kind of day that you’ve had, then I encourage you to watch Anchorman, or find a movie like it, and allow the humor to take over. 

Did you enjoy these funny Ron Burgundy quotes?

Which of the quotes is your favorite?

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Let us know in the comment section below.

Stephanie Kirby
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