25 Talladega Nights Quotes From Baby Jesus And Shake And Bake

These hilarious Talladega Nights quotes will make you feel like a winner, so buckle up.

From the duo that brought you Anchorman and Step Brothers, Will Ferrell and Adam McKay are known for writing ridiculous characters who spit out quotable one-liners.

It’s no different for their film Talladega Nights.

This uproarious comedy starring Will Ferrell takes us on a wild and hilarious ride through the high-octane world of NASCAR, where speed, rivalry, and absurdity collide in a glorious explosion of laughter.

Tell us your favorite Talladega Nights quote in the comment section below.

What Are The Benefits Of Reading These Talladega Nights Quotes?

This classic comedy shows us the Ballad of Ricky Bobby, A NASCAR star who needs to learn a bit of humility.

These quotes will:

  • Remind you that no matter how good you are, there is always room to grow.
  • Make you laugh
  • Offer some life lessons and give you perspective

Laughing is good for you, so go ahead and give this movie a shot.

Talladega Nights Facts And Background

Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly provide hysterical performances as NASCAR winning and NASCAR second place (which, if we’re honest, is the same thing as last) drivers. 

Farrell and McKay came up with the idea of “Will Ferrell as a NASCAR driver” at a NASCAR race in Fontana, California.

And “Dear Lord Baby Jesus” Ricky Bobby was born!

Released in August 2006, the film ranked no. 1 at the box office in its first week and grossed $163 million worldwide.

It has generally received favorable reviews, with an approval rating of 71% on Rotten Tomatoes and an average score of 66% on Metacritic.

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These winning Talladega Nights quotes are sure to make you laugh.

And if you need even more laughter, be sure also to check out our collection of Dave Chappelle quotes and these hilarious quotes from the movie Elf.

Talladega Nights Quotes On Winning

1. “If you ain’t first, you’re last.” — Ricky Bobby

Talladega Nights quotes on being first

2. “You’ve gotta cross over the anger bridge and come back to the friendship shore.” — Cal Naughton Jr.

Hilarious Talladega Nights Quotes

3. “I wet my bed until I was nineteen. There’s no shame in that.” — Cal Naughton, Jr.

funny Talladega Nights Quotes

4. “Like the frightened baby chipmunk, you are scared by anything that is different.” — Jean Girard

Talladega Nights quotes on being scared

5. “Ricky, remember: The field mouse is fast, but the owl sees at night.” — Chip

Talladega Nights quotes will make you feel like a winner

Talladega Nights Quotes For All The Fans

6. “No one lives forever, no one. But with advances in modern science and my high-level income, it’s not crazy to think I can live to be 245, maybe 300.” — Ricky Bobby

Talladega Nights quotes about life

7. “I came here to tell you one thing: come race time tomorrow, I’m coming for you.” – Ricky Bobby

Talladega Nights quotes about race time

8. “Here’s the deal—I’m the best there is. Plain and simple. I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.” — Ricky Bobby

best Talladega Nights quotes

9. “You gotta learn to drive with the fear, and there ain’t nothing more God damn frightening than driving with a live cougar in the car.” — Reese Bobby

Talladega Nights quotes about driving

10. “But before I can do that, I must be beaten by a driver who is truly better than me.” – Jean Girard

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Talladega Nights quotes

11. “May God be with you, Monsieur Bobby. Because although today I am friendly. Tomorrow will be war!” – Jean Girard

Talladega Nights quotes

Talladega Nights Quotes That Will Make You Laugh

12. “We go together like cocaine and waffles.” — Cal Naughton Jr.

Talladega Nights quotes and lines

13. “Are we about to get it on? Because I’m as hard as a diamond in an ice storm right now.” — Ricky Bobby

funny Talladega Nights quotes

14. “There’s nothing more frightening than driving with a live goddamn cougar next to you.”
— Reese Bobby

Talladega Nights quotes on driving

15. “I like to picture my Jesus in a tuxedo T-shirt. ‘Cause it says like, I wanna be formal but I’m here to party too. I like to party, so I like my Jesus to party.” — Cal Naughton, Jr.

long Talladega Nights quotes

16. “Dear Lord Baby Jesus, I want to thank you for this wonderful meal, my two beautiful sons, Walker and Texas Ranger, and my red-hot smokin’ wife, Carley.” – Ricky Bobby

Talladega Nights quotes hilarious

17. “Well, let me give you a saying from Colonel Sanders. I am too drunk to taste this chicken.” — Ricky Bobby

Talladega Nights quotes to laugh about

18. “I like to think of Jesus as an Ice Dancer, dressed in an all-white jumpsuit, and doing an interpretive dance of my life.” — Cal Naughton, Jr.

short Talladega Nights quotes

19. “Daddy, you made that grace your b*tch.” — Walker Bobby

Talladega Nights quotes short

20. “Old man, I’m gonna come at you like a spider monkey!” — Texas Ranger

memorable Talladega Nights quotes

Talladega Nights Quotes That Will Turn You Into A Champion

21. “Did that blow your mind? Because that just happened!” – Ricky Bobby

Talladega Nights quotes and sayings

22. “I don’t know what to do with my hands.” – Ricky Bobby

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short Talladega Nights quotes and lines

23. “I’m all jacked up on Mountain Dew!” – Texas Ranger

Talladega Nights quotes to make you laugh

24. “Aaaaah, Ricky Bobby! Now we shall dance. And yes, it will be a slow jam.” – Jean Girard

sayings and Talladega Nights quotes

25. “This sticker is dangerous and inconvenient, but I do love Fig Newtons.” – Ricky Bobby

Talladega Nights quotes to make your day

Which Hysterical Quote Is Your Favorite?

If you’re a fan of Will Ferrell, Talladega Nights is probably near the top of your favorite movie list.

The film bursts with outrageous one-liners, bizarre characters, and hilarious antics. 

So, whether it is a film you’ve seen once or a hundred times, we hope these quotes made you laugh.

Keep these Talladega Nights quotes in mind the next time you need to feel like a winner. 

Let us know in the comment section below which one is your favorite.

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  1. Michelle

    July 18, 2021 at 4:55 AM

    So many of these quotes are wrong
    70. Is said by Reese Bobby not Texas ranger

  2. Mike honcho

    May 28, 2020 at 10:22 AM

    *the late great colonel sanders

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