50 Turkey Quotes Celebrating The All American Bird

By Clifton Sankofa | Published September 2, 2023

Flap your wings and get your fixings ready with our turkey quotes.

Turkeys are one of the most recognizable birds in the world.

They are fascinating creatures who have been giving their lives for the sake of humanity for generations.

Learn what makes these awesome avians so cool with our turkey quotes.

What is a turkey?

The turkey is a large bird native to North America.

They are large birds of the genus Meleagris.

Check out these turkey facts:

The fleshy wattle on a male turkey is called a snood.
Male turkeys are much bigger and more colorful than females.
There are two species of turkey: wild turkey and ocellated turkey.

How did the turkey get its name?

There are several theories on how the turkey got its name.

Some suggest that Indigenous peoples domesticated the wild turkeys of North America.

Some historians believe these turkeys were shared during the Columbian exchange.

Others suggest that Turkish merchant ships traded the birds with Englishmen, resulting in the Brits wrongly associating the birds with the people of Turkey.

The name stuck and was transferred from the Old World to the New World when European settlers began taking over the Americas.

Benjamin Franklin referred to the turkey as a “bird of courage” and “a true original native of America.”

This reverence did not stop people from overhunting turkeys.

Can turkeys fly?

One of the most interesting experiences is when people who grew up around domesticated turkeys see a wild turkey take flight.

The domesticated birds you see at your local farm cannot fly.

They are bred to be consumed, so they are heavier and more meaty.

However, wild turkeys can fly and have been clocked at speeds as fast as fifty-five miles per hour!

Turkey won’t fly for long distances like migrating birds, but they can take short flights.

Do all turkeys gobble?

Part of the fun of turkeys is their unique sound.

Turkeys make a sound that many people call a gobble.

Both male and female birds gobble.

In turkey language, the gobble is a form of communication that birds use to share information, denote love, or express fight or flight responses.

To learn more, check out our turkey quotes below.

Short turkey quotes honoring America’s favorite bird

Let’s start our Turkey quotes journey with these short and sweet observations about everyone’s favorite bird.

1. “We’re all turkeys!” — Phil Collins

2. “Turkeys are perfect for feeding larger gatherings.” — Pipa Middleton

3. “There’s turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastrami.” — Mitch Hedberg

4. “Love is a big fat turkey, and every day is Thanksgiving.” — Charles Bukowski

5. “The best way to thaw a frozen turkey? Blow in it’s ear.” — Johnny Carson

6. “Someone needs to tell the turkey, Man, just be yourself.” — Mitch Hedberg

7. “If you associate with turkeys, you will never fly with the eagles.” — Brian Tracy

8. “Coexistence: what the farmer does with the turkey until Thanksgiving.” — Mike Connolly

9. “Cooking tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out.” — Nicole Hollander

10. “If you want to soar like an eagle in life, you can’t be flocking with the turkeys.” — Warren Buffett

The best turkey quotes for bird lovers

Some say the turkey is a blessing from Mother Earth.

11. “As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly!!!” — Gordon Jump

12. “Someone wrote me that ‘the turkey tasted great, but the plastic cup melted.” — Heloise

13. “Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother’s tasted better the day before.” — Rita Rudner

14. “A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen.” — Kin Hubbard

15. “My favorite meal is turkey and mashed potatoes. I love Thanksgiving, it’s just my favorite.” — Cindy Margolis

16. “A two-pound turkey and a fifty-pound cranberry; that’s Thanksgiving dinner at Three Mile Island.” — Johnny Carson

17. “I wrote in a column that one should put a cup of liquid in the cavity of a turkey when roasting it.” — Heloise

18. “It was dramatic to watch my grandmother decapitate a turkey with an ax the day before Thanksgiving.” — Russell Baker

19. “Nowadays, the expense of hiring grandmothers for the ax work would probably qualify all turkeys so honored with gourmet status.” — Russell Baker

20. “If you want to save a species, simply decide to eat it. Then it will be managed – like chickens, like turkeys, like deer, like Canadian geese.” — Ted Nugent

The top turkey quotes for America’s favorite holiday dinner

Turkey is by far the most popular bird eaten on holidays.

21. “I hate turkeys.” — Mitch Hedberg

22. “Turkeys, quails, and small birds are here to be seen.” — William Bartram

23. “Turkey is undoubtedly one of the best gifts that the New World has made to the Old.” — Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin

24. “I love Thanksgiving turkey; It’s the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.” — Arnold Schwarzenegger

25. “Here’s a Thanksgiving tip. Generally, your turkey is not cooked enough if it passes you the cranberry sauce.” — Joan Rivers

26. “I want to wake up and hear birds; I want to walk outside and see a gaggle of turkeys bouncing across my lawn.” — Karen Allen

27. “We’re having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we’re having a swan. You get more stuffing” — George Carlin

28. “But by the time Thanksgiving came around, we sort of thought of the turkey as a pet, so we ate the dog. Only kidding. It was the cat!” — David Letterman

29. “When I was a kid in Indiana, we thought it would be fun to get a turkey a year ahead of time and feed it and so on for the following Thanksgiving.” — David Letterman

30. “Try this: say the words “global, global, global” aloud several times, as fast as you can; you’ll find yourself sounding like a turkey (“gobble, gobble, gobble”).” — Jim Stanford

Famous turkey quotes and sayings about the generous avian

Every year, hundreds of millions of turkeys give up their lives for humanity’s sake.

31. “When turkeys mate, they think of swans.” — Johnny Carson

32. “A turkey is more occult and awful than all the angels and archangels.” — Gilbert K. Chesterton

33. “Thanksgiving day. Let us all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks now, but the turkeys.” — Mark Twain

34. “There’s always something to be thankful for on Thanksgiving. Even if it’s just not being a turkey.” — Rizzie Wan

35. “Most people don’t realize turkeys are friendly, they’re social, they’re loyal, they have emotions.” — Shannon Elizabeth

36. “If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get mad at turkeys.” — Mitch Hedberg

37. “Real ballplayers pass the stuffing by rolling it up in a ball and batting it across the table with a turkey leg.” — Tom Swyers

38. “Turkey: A large bird whose flesh, when eaten on certain religious anniversaries, has the peculiar property of attesting piety and gratitude.” — Ambrose Bierce

39. “The Thankstini: A fun and delicious new novelty drink I invented. Cranberry juice, potato vodka, and a bouillon cube. Tastes just like a turkey dinner.” — Barney Stinson

40. “If the soup had been as warm as the wine; if the wine had been as old as the turkey; and if the turkey had had a breast like the maid, it would have been a swell dinner.” — Duncan Hines

Turkey quotes and sayings about life

Let’s finish our turkey adventure with these thoughtful quotes about turkey.

41. “Thanksgiving without tension is like a Thanksgiving without turkey. It can be done, but it is not the norm.” — Mary Schmich

42. “Thanksgiving day. Let us all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks now, but the turkeys.” — Mark Twain

43. “Real ballplayers pass the stuffing by rolling it up in a ball and batting it across the table with a turkey leg.” — Tom Swyers

44. “The turkey’s eyes are such that he can see a bumblebee turn a somersault on the verge of the horizon.” — Archibald Rutledge

45. “We’re having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we’re having a swan. You get more stuffing.” — George Carlin

46. “My favorite meal is turkey and mashed potatoes. I love Thanksgiving; it’s just my favorite. I can have Thanksgiving all year round.” — Cindy Margolis

47. “The turkey. The sweet potatoes. The stuffing. The pumpkin pie. Is there anything else we can agree so vehemently about? I don’t think so.” — Nora Ephron

48. “In so far as God has partly revealed to us an angelic world, he has partly told us what an angel means; But God has never told us what a turkey means.” — Gilbert K. Chesterton

49. “And if you go and stare at a live turkey for an hour or two, you will find by the end of it that the enigma has rather increased than diminished.” — Gilbert K. Chesterton

50. “Thanksgiving is the day when you turn to another family member and say, How long has Mom been drinking like this? My Mom, after six Bloody Marys, looks at the turkey and goes, Here, kitty, kitty.’” — David Letterman